Navigating the pathway of surrogacy is akin to sailing through uncharted waters. As intended parents, you are the captain steering your ship towards the horizon, with your surrogate acting as a lighthouse guiding you safely to shore.
It's a voyage filled with emotions, anticipation, and sometimes unexpected turbulence.
However, two essential ingredients can smooth out these waves - trust and compassion.
Trust: The Anchor in Your Journey
Trust is like an anchor for your ship amidst the tumultuous sea of surrogacy. When storms hit - whether it's a medical setback or emotional stress - this anchor keeps your ship steady.
Establishing trust with your surrogate begins from day one. Open communication is key here - share your hopes, fears, expectations and listen to hers too.
Transparency fosters trustworthiness.
Consider creating a surrogacy agreement that outlines every detail of this journey. This legal document protects both parties and serves as a testament to mutual trust.
A 2018 study by Family Process Institute found that intended parents who established strong bonds of trust with their surrogate experienced less anxiety throughout the process[^1^]. So invest time in building this relationship - it pays off in more ways than one!
Compassion: The Wind in Your Sails
Compassion is like the wind that propels your ship forward on it's journey. Empathy towards what your surrogate is going through physically and emotionally fuels this wind.
Remember, she's not just carrying a baby - she's carrying dreams - yours and hers alike! Acknowledge her sacrifices - they're monumental!
Small gestures go a long way here – regular check-ins or sending thoughtful gifts can make her feel valued.
And, understanding her perspective will help reduce any potential misunderstandings down the line. A survey conducted by Journal of Reproductive & Infant Psychology revealed that compassionate interactions between intended parents and surrogates resulted in more positive experiences[^2^].
The Synergy of Trust and Compassion
Trust and compassion are not standalone ingredients - they work best when mixed together. When you trust your surrogate, it's easier to empathize with her journey.
Similarly, showing compassion towards her reinforces the trust she has in you.
A real-world example of this synergy is Sarah and Mark (names changed for privacy). They were a couple struggling with infertility who decided to start on the surrogacy journey.
Their relationship with their surrogate, Emily, was built on mutual trust and understanding from the get-go.
Sarah often shared how she appreciated Emily's sacrifice by sending handwritten notes along with care packages. This compassionate gesture reinforced Emily's trust in them as intended parents.
In return, Emily kept them involved throughout the pregnancy - sharing ultrasound images, inviting them to doctor appointments etc., further strengthening their bond of trust.
Their story beautifully illustrates how intertwining trust and compassion can create a positive surrogacy experience for all parties involved.
As you work your way your own surrogacy journey remember: let trust be your anchor amidst any stormy seas, allow compassion to fill your sails propelling you forward. With these two essential ingredients onboard, your voyage will surely lead to the beautiful destination of parenthood!
P.S. Your thoughts, questions or personal stories related to this topic are always welcome!
Don't forget to like and share this post so others embarking on their own surrogacy journeys can benefit too!
[^1^]: Millbank J., Stuhmcke A., Karpin I.A., “Embryo Donation and Understanding of Kinship: The Impact of Law and Policy,” Human Reproduction 33(1), 2018.
[^2^]: Imrie S., Jadva V., “The Long-Term Experiences of Surrogates: Relationships and Contact with Surrogacy Families in Genetic and Gestational Surrogacy Arrangements,” Reproductive BioMedicine Online 29(4), 2014.
Commenti